Many people know someone who says they are reexamining their faith or are struggling with doubts and confusion. Perhaps you yourself have had spiritual questions but did not know how to answer them.

Deconstruction is “the analytic examination of something (such as a theory) often in order to reveal its inadequacy,” according to the Merriam-Webster Dictionary.

“Faith deconstruction is removing all the dirt and grime from Christ that come from human error and legalism,” said Aaron Thomas, a pastor in Maryland. “[People] just want [Christ]. They want the Christ that they see in the Bible or the Christ they've gotten a taste of in some of their experiences."

Aaron Thomas and his wife, Karrie Thomas, started Seeds and Water Collective together after planting a church on the East Coast, he said. Especially after seeing the way a church treated believers who were going through a tragedy and were confused about what they believed in, they saw the need for a ministry like Seeds and Water.

Often, people who are hesitant to bring up spiritual questions have been hurt in the past from the church emphasizing the heaviness of sin or a legalistic approach to salvation, Aaron Thomas said. In a world where many different voices claim to be Christian, the Gospel can get clouded, leaving hurt believers trying to figure out the truth without knowing where to go.

At Seeds and Water, Aaron Thomas works as a pastor, seeking to help deconstructing Christians find Christ underneath the layers of pain, misconceptions and legalism that human error can cause in the church, he said.

Karrie Thomas reads her Bible at a retreat in Virginia in 2019. Karrie and Aaron Thomas build sabbath retreats for themselves to practice what they encourage others to do, he said. Photo courtesy of Aaron Thomas

All the services that Seeds and Water Collective offer are free, because they want to make it as easy as possible for people to pursue faith in Christ, Aaron Thomas said.

“All of our experiences are centered around human beings getting out of the way, so that people who are wounded or hurting can encounter the risen Christ,” Aaron Thomas said.

Some of the services they offer include both spiritual care, where they listen to individual stories and cater support, and coaching groups and ministries, where they help a church’s leadership team learn how to assist their congregation on their own, Aaron Thomas said. Seeds and Water mostly provides support via Zoom since the pandemic, but they look forward to offering in-person services soon.

Aaron and Karrie Thomas pose together in Maryland in 2021. They have led the ministry together for 22 years, Aaron Thomas said. Photo courtesy of Aaron Thomas

Aaron Thomas said he finds it encouraging that there are many public deconstruction stories right now. The large number of stories is a sign that honest conversations about doubts or pain have become safer and more normalized.

“I was going through a very difficult time in my life, and [Thomas] helped me process my pain, my doubts, my calling,” Brenda, a Seeds and Water client, said in her testimonial.

Brenda admits that being vulnerable with people can be very difficult, but Thomas made it easier for her by genuinely listening to her.

“He never judged me for my struggles; he showed compassion and empathy and always knew exactly what to ask when I felt lost. He is definitely someone that knows how to follow the Spirit’s lead when helping someone,” Brenda said.

Several people pose for a picture after their Restore Baptism in Maryland in 2013. Thomas used this picture in his early development meetings with Seeds and Water supporters, Aaron Thomas said. Photo courtesy of Aaron Thomas

It is important for all believers, not just spiritual caregivers, to know how to help others who are deconstructing, Aaron Thomas said.

The most important thing to do for a friend who is deconstructing is to listen, Aaron Thomas said. The friend needs to listen and show unconditional love by listening to what they have to say, before giving opinions or advice.

Listening like this is only possible when the listeners themselves are in deep communion with Christ, Aaron Thomas said. They cannot expect to help others if they are not letting Christ tend to their own wounds.

Shannon Little reads her Bible at a retreat in Maryland. The in-person retreats were stopped because of the pandemic, but they look forward to resuming them soon, Aaron Thomas said. Photo from Aaron Thomas

It is also important for churches to have trauma awareness and training for how to help people who are deconstructing, Aaron Thomas said. Being willing to get training may be a part of allowing Christ to heal your wounds, and if a friend is going through something that you do not feel qualified to help with, perhaps the most effective thing you can do is to point them to professionals who are ready to help them, like Seeds and Water Collective.

Whether you or a loved one wants someone to talk to about deconstruction, or you want to be trained in how to help someone who does, you can find out more about how Seeds and Water Collective could help you by going to their website.

Clara Lind is currently an English student at George Fox University. She has published a few articles in The Wallflower Journal and one for The Gospel Coalition. She enjoys writing about how God is working in the world, and sharing stories that will glorify God and encourage others.